Weng Weng Lyrics

We've had many requests for us to post the lyrics to the Weng Weng song, so these are them. Enjoy!
Props to the first person who notices what the first 2 lines of the 3rd verse is a parody of! (Think classic rap. Jock jam rap, even)


(Chud Two)

Eh yo, we good to go?
hell yeah, it's agent 00
Don't want no trouble though,
so you best to put your weapon down slow
Keep your hands low down so he can see them
Don't put them up high, he's a tiny human being
Guaranteeing security to Filipino citizens
It's all the same thing to Weng Weng
Guilty, innocent
He's got his own style, he's got a cute little smile
In fact one time he even got picked up by a pedophile
But kill that, he's skilled at
the art of attack
He got a razor blade hat, a little gat
and a rocket pack
He doesn't like booze
so never pour him a shot of scotch
Just give him a Coke
and you won't get a pop in the crotch
His movies you love to watch,
you know that they all sweet
Weng Weng is doing his thang thang
under three feet
They say that he's wack, that he's weak
Ehyo, you know what?
Just say that in the Philipines and watch out for the bowl cut.

(Chud One)

You're in the gettaway car,
'cause you just finished a heist
got through the SWAT, lots of cops
so you're thinking you're nice
Mastermind, genius-thief
you think you already own the title
from behind you hear the wine
of a mini-motorcycle
It rolls up quick with 2'6
of trouble on top
he shoots a look, crooks get shook
and you could feel your heart stop
The kinda man that could chill you right down to your soul
he shouts "Pull over to the side of the road, I'm interpol"
Best oblige, and subside
'cause if not you're sure to die
by a bo staff to the gonads
or a sai in your eye
Try and flip the script
if he's outnumbered and underhanded
he's outstanding, he could jump the Grand Canyon and land it
A mini bandit, fighting for justice, he'll never lose
finest barbers and tailors
you know he's always lookin' smooth
He'll take you out without a doubt,
boom bing and bang bang
My advice to criminals is
"Stay the fuck away from Weng Weng."

(Chuds)
Weng Weng Weng Weng 2'9
He'll kick you in the nutsack from behind
If you think Weng Weng is coming soft or slack
Never that, never that, never that, he's
Back on the scene it's the man
who just cash cheques and have sex
he's seen your mamma nekkid with his high tech mod specs
Burst in hotel rooms never givin' a shit
if he sees a naked bitch, best belive she get a tender kiss
After bustin' some heads, ya'll could catch him at the disco
Rockin' upskirts and clockin' more thongs than Cisqo
Stayin' alive is no jive, when he dance, the woman cry
They get hypnotized by his hips swayin' side to side
These fake secret agents try to front but the get played
Weng Weng could pierce Brosnan with a katana blade
Leave you in the hospital
your condition is critical,
You're finished bro, even the doctors sound a little cynical

(Spoken)
Eh yo, I'll tell you what. That Weng Weng? He's a stone-faced killer. I mean criminals ain't got no shot against him, why even try?